Tuesday, May 09, 2006

II. primitive plucked to throne

These aches align narrative to flesh
telling requiring a pulse, authority a duration
under a moon dance, connecting dots of circumstance
recording its childhood to spur a design, a proof of love
otherwise, that altar barren with impotent worship
needed: the pain of becoming stark monument—
a stuffed species hiding a tale of the hunt
for if pure, like glossy eyes’ caress, or the absence in a museum display
then moments as daggers, fight for record
such anti-heroes, frightening the spectacle, that sacred now

Courage murdered by alien histories, we pause to weak reflection
bracing the illusory condition, forced to, by misguided semblances
they squint so her blurred female form may move miracles
better to suffer and confess the leanness of sin, the duties of post-enigma[ERD1] , she thinks
and content embarks
phantoms to labor
milking centaurs for provisions[ERD2] :
nutrients for seekers, myths in their spinning
from impulse the reign conforms
not to power, but its expectation,
makes a mockery of ruler and ruled
sores on the hips of atmosphere
but imagining the essential moment, cherub curls at attention[ERD3]
and sighs being the means of passage[ERD4]
which given endless vacancy,
causes targets to recede in and out of security[ERD5]
like mood awaiting a new goldfish
the purgatory of retrieval from a death not felt, but repeated
in a blink of inattention[ERD6]

That darker blush (anxiety) removes the wandering eye[ERD7] instantly, retaining the tortured will
blowing at a daffodil for fortune, but self-consciousness,
that lengthy umbilical cord
strangling an omen with ethics
devised in possessing pattern, that of parental kinesis
or a brute history, abstract vultures
and talons polishing crystal[ERD8] ; with a cripple by the ear—
summoned from a vagrant archive to stroke a modern beard

So from this here blurred perspective, memory,
like a conduct manual, otherwise dormant
a doormat for self axels, which later grow rusty or bored
nature’s utility altered with a smear
watercolor sense
predecessor and plucked meet in a vortex, ahistorical and sitting with crowns of glory,
ears buckling to a lethargic ornament.
& in daydream, trusting desires, meeting again, closer
free from the gravity of spectators[ERD9] ,
evading turf wars, those dramatic plots of identity[ERD10]
loosing all that conflict on an equation’s whiteboard[ERD11]
a radiant annihilation, duties without monument falling to wayside[ERD12]
a kaleidoscope unity emerges
until awake in conscious disunity, another fit
when alienation and suicide fondle each others lairs
indigenous pride hints at that trinity[ERD13] of motion: pistol, terror, elegy
stir in the mundane bathwater, saying nothing of that desperate end (absolute)
nor the right to womb, by now paint-peeled from metaphor
again that thought fleeting to joint management[ERD14] : object and beloved

So with a principle of irreducibility[ERD15] :
knowing is piracy, awareness hisses[ERD16] in the rustles of migratory desire
a mother tongue scribbles, recoiling at stages of life[ERD17]
burning the borderlands of spirit, lost context
to clouds, a veiled artifact embroidered in uncanny design
how vacant and strangely alive
is flesh subject[ERD18] to shifting heavens,
that falling formula halts[ERD19] :
(Without tribute to--its being in motion or the slope of its mood)[ERD20]
it just happens, as a desert language of water seeks--
alone, trembling, conviction indents to widows’ peaks,
thirsty for sequence, asking--beyond, the shared space heater
question: does memory create identity?
Subtext: which one?
Hypothetical: But if grazing similar grass—postures melting to pastures
But he has left the field, willed death, that fool
A divine right of kings in flames
So again, that thought to joint-ventures
Never learning to see how the phoenix does
Our heroine resurrects to confront
But given only a livelihood of reflection from a guest friend[ERD21]
Will she choose to testify? And force speech from the cracks of her diaspora
-That vulva without constant-[ERD22]
Choice is postpartum[ERD23] , reflex brings variables--
Those relative and noble cells taught to defend a lifetime

[ERD1]Becoming human rather than inhabiting fantasy…just as grey-eyed Athena must do to falsify herself.

[ERD2]Imagination = sustenance

[ERD3]Like in a portrait, moment captured with angel babies at attention.

[ERD4]The lightness of movement. But sighs are heavy too.

[ERD5]‘All Men are Mortal’/ immediacies change;

[ERD6]what if in that blink you forget yourself, like a blink dream…utterly transposed.

[ERD7]Is agency lost? That will-to-constructivism made damp by anxiety, and fear remains, just coping…

[ERD8]Crystal palace

[ERD9]Connoting the community-initiated awareness of flesh, as a mundane organizing principle.

[ERD10]Hegel, “other”s

[ERD11]The optimistic essentializing of lord and bondsman. There is no one meta-narrative for conflict, multiplicity of dependence…and dialogics (?)

[ERD12]Duties need a spark, but a unity of sparks? Without monument, the constellation of virtues becomes kaleidoscoped.

[ERD13](being ironic): about the causality/intervals of pride. What would relative pride look like? Relative pride = postmodern…various “confessional” communities internalized into the psyche for censorship.

[ERD14]The objective/subjective dualism…love corrupts the object, redefines autonomy

[ERD15]Without reducing nothing can be a priori. Everything suffers from Humean comparison. Desire/sentiment is distinction.

[ERD16]Awareness is somehow outside of thought. But intuited. Like, the thing-in-itself for Hegel which can only be conquered through idealism.

[ERD17]Experience corrupts self-determined will. This is Augustine-Rousseau movement. Archetype: Stirner

[ERD18]Subject= a. submissive b. the topic or axis (this formula = constancy or balance of ego)

[ERD19]The Fall/s do/es not destroy metaphor or intuiting…It is not totalizing. But is metaphysics, is punishment, is a degree. Nonetheless, very strongly orienting; but as discourse/allusion never inescapable.

[ERD20]Newton vs. Einstein

[ERD21]Anthropomorphized god/creator as ‘guest friend’—connoting reciprocity

[ERD22]Luce Irigaray: E=MC^2
vs. Placenta



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